As I sat with my PASS camp group of third graders, we finished review early and started playing some literacy games. One student sitting beside me started playing with my hair and kinda inspecting it.
"You know, you've got some gray hair," I heard her say.
"Thanks," I said nonchalantly.
"What do you mean thanks? You don't care?" she asked in surprise.
"Nope."
Ah, the funny part is this came within hours after my previous post...the day after the doctor used the phrase "that age." LOL!!!!!
I'm not one to really think of my age other than..."Wow, I didn't realize that much time has passed." I know I'm not old and I pray I have many more years ahead of me. As a matter of fact, what is age other than a number? There are times I stop and it hits me....when did I become old enough to be a mom? a wife? a teacher? The list could go on and on.
So yes, the icing on the cake from yesterday is now I have students finding my gray hairs. Gotta love their honesty.
Thursday, May 7, 2009
That Age
So what is that age?
A few years back my mom returned from the doctor with her first story of "Well, you are getting to be that age." Ever since she's had similar stories from doctors.
So much so that we often use that line around the house for various reasons.
Yesterday I went for a follow up appointment with my regular doctor that should've been done months ago. Of course he went back over family history double checking who has diabetes, etc. Same ole same ole...I thought.....
After stating that my dad, uncles, grandparents, etc. have diabetes and it was clarified that diabetes runs on both sides of my family, the doctor looked up from his note taking and told me, "Well you're getting to that age where I think you should have blood work done yearly since there is a history. This way we can keep a check on cholesterol, blood sugar, anemia,etc."
Yay me! Woo hoo! NOT! I guess I finally got to "That age" of course I thought I still had another decade before that. Afterall I don't recall my mom getting that speech until she was closer to her 40s. Maybe that's just selective memory on my part.
So for all you 20somethings out there BEWARE...you're almost to "That Age"
From a 29 year old who is now "that age"
A few years back my mom returned from the doctor with her first story of "Well, you are getting to be that age." Ever since she's had similar stories from doctors.
So much so that we often use that line around the house for various reasons.
Yesterday I went for a follow up appointment with my regular doctor that should've been done months ago. Of course he went back over family history double checking who has diabetes, etc. Same ole same ole...I thought.....
After stating that my dad, uncles, grandparents, etc. have diabetes and it was clarified that diabetes runs on both sides of my family, the doctor looked up from his note taking and told me, "Well you're getting to that age where I think you should have blood work done yearly since there is a history. This way we can keep a check on cholesterol, blood sugar, anemia,etc."
Yay me! Woo hoo! NOT! I guess I finally got to "That age" of course I thought I still had another decade before that. Afterall I don't recall my mom getting that speech until she was closer to her 40s. Maybe that's just selective memory on my part.
So for all you 20somethings out there BEWARE...you're almost to "That Age"
From a 29 year old who is now "that age"
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Cracker Jack Degree
As the decision time draws near for my dissertation topic, I am reminded of the decision I made a year ago. Pursue my doctorate in education? Where? How?
Even before achieving my Masters in Curriculum and Instruction: Literacy from Lesley University, I was already thinking about a doctorate. My masters was set up in a cohort format that met one full weekend a month every month for almost 2 years. The weekends were intense, but the schedule worked for me and I wouldn't do it any other way. I still can't imagine how I would have done it if I had to attend classes on a weekly basis. I know I would have, but the format I chose was great and I got to learn from professors from all over the states.
After taking a year off from schooling I couldn't stop the itch to return. Some people are addicted to drugs, others alcohol, others shopping. Well, I guess I'm addicted to learning. So I began comparing my options.
With 2 little ones at home, I knew I needed a program with a lot of flexibility. I also talked with 2 colleagues who are also pursuing their doctorate in education. One actually attending USC and the other online through Walden. I looked at both of their course work loads and quality and sometimes thought the online way had more work to do, but I knew this was probably going to be the way to go.
Unfortunately I'm also one who worries about what others think and I constantly plan and live in the future (although I'm trying hard not to). With so many people with the thought that online degrees are a dime a dozen or cracker jack degrees, I really struggled with committing to an online program, but then I got to thinking....
What does the future hold? Technology certainly isn't slowing down. As a matter of fact, there are many high schools now offering classes via online format. And to tell the truth, I honestly think that one day, online will be the norm for schooling. Scary...I know. After all what about class discussion, face to face communication, etc. Well apparently that's what things like Elluminate and video classes are for.
So here I am. In my third semester with Nova Southeastern pursuing my Educational Doctorate in Instructional Leadership with concentrations in Curriculum Development and Early Childhood.
Not only do the classes fit my schedule, but it is so eye opening to read other perspectives from peers across the world. Yes world. This is something hard found by attending a local university where all the students are living and working in similar settings.
So am I receiving a Cracker Jack degree? A degree that is a dime a dozen? I don't think so and for anyone who disagrees. Have you challenged yourself to be disciplined enough to pursue an online course let alone degree? Have you compared the curriculum of the doctorate from the local university to that of an online program?
And for everyone wanting to know how I do this with children and with all that has occupied my year....by the GRACE of GOD! and lots of family support.
Even before achieving my Masters in Curriculum and Instruction: Literacy from Lesley University, I was already thinking about a doctorate. My masters was set up in a cohort format that met one full weekend a month every month for almost 2 years. The weekends were intense, but the schedule worked for me and I wouldn't do it any other way. I still can't imagine how I would have done it if I had to attend classes on a weekly basis. I know I would have, but the format I chose was great and I got to learn from professors from all over the states.
After taking a year off from schooling I couldn't stop the itch to return. Some people are addicted to drugs, others alcohol, others shopping. Well, I guess I'm addicted to learning. So I began comparing my options.
With 2 little ones at home, I knew I needed a program with a lot of flexibility. I also talked with 2 colleagues who are also pursuing their doctorate in education. One actually attending USC and the other online through Walden. I looked at both of their course work loads and quality and sometimes thought the online way had more work to do, but I knew this was probably going to be the way to go.
Unfortunately I'm also one who worries about what others think and I constantly plan and live in the future (although I'm trying hard not to). With so many people with the thought that online degrees are a dime a dozen or cracker jack degrees, I really struggled with committing to an online program, but then I got to thinking....
What does the future hold? Technology certainly isn't slowing down. As a matter of fact, there are many high schools now offering classes via online format. And to tell the truth, I honestly think that one day, online will be the norm for schooling. Scary...I know. After all what about class discussion, face to face communication, etc. Well apparently that's what things like Elluminate and video classes are for.
So here I am. In my third semester with Nova Southeastern pursuing my Educational Doctorate in Instructional Leadership with concentrations in Curriculum Development and Early Childhood.
Not only do the classes fit my schedule, but it is so eye opening to read other perspectives from peers across the world. Yes world. This is something hard found by attending a local university where all the students are living and working in similar settings.
So am I receiving a Cracker Jack degree? A degree that is a dime a dozen? I don't think so and for anyone who disagrees. Have you challenged yourself to be disciplined enough to pursue an online course let alone degree? Have you compared the curriculum of the doctorate from the local university to that of an online program?
And for everyone wanting to know how I do this with children and with all that has occupied my year....by the GRACE of GOD! and lots of family support.
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Broken
When I started the post below on March 13, it was supposed to be about broken items and finding uses or ways to fix them, not giving up, somehow it turned into something else. A message someone needs to hear? I don't know, but the words are now written and my original intent is lost. Guess not having my writer's notebook all the time can sometimes lead to the unplanned writing below. I pray that if this was written because someone out there needs to read it that they either read my blog already or because they found it somehow through Divine intervention.
Psalm 34:18 (New International Version)
18 The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
What does it meant to be broken? Is it beyond repair? Can it no longer be of use?
As we sat in a back pew at church a few weeks ago I heard Bradley saying, "Mommy, look it's broken."
"What's broken?"
"My crayon," and Bradley held up the crayon.
The tip of it had been broken off.
So many times we look at things and declare them broken, but it's not this label that distinguishes it from everything else. It is what we decide to do about it. It's our actions that determine what it truly means to be broken. I chose to show Bradley the crayon could still be used, we just needed to peel back the paper.
Can you think of other instances in your life when you've declared something broken or felt broken? Have you ever cried out to God asking, "Why?" Have you ever had those days when you think it may be an okay day, but then you get one piece of bad news, followed by another, and it feels as if you can't go any further? What do you decide to do?
Whether the broken item is something concrete, tangible or whether it is a feeling; it is up to you to decide. As the scripture verse at the beginning of this post says, God is with the brokenhearted. Even if you feel as if you are broken, God still loves you, he still cares.
As I've written in the past, sometimes you have to fall in order to become stronger. The same is true for being broken. So you make the choice, do you give up on life just because a few things go wrong and you feel as if you will never have the strength to go on? Or do you give in, hit rock bottom, then fight to survive and pick up the pieces so you become stronger? Can you pick up all those pieces without God?
Lord, please help us all to find you through our struggles. Help us to find the belief in our self and to find the strength that you know we possess. Amen.
Broken by Lindsey Haun
Wake up to a sunny day,
Not a cloud up in the sky
Then it starts to rain.
My defenses hit the ground,
and they shatter all around
So open and exposed
But I find strength in the struggle
Face to face with my trouble
Chorus: When you're broken,
in a million little pieces
And you're trying,
but you can't hold on anymore
Every tear falls down for a reason
Don't you stop believing in yourself
When you're broken.
Little girl don't be so blue
I know what you're going through
Don't let it beat you up.
Hitting walls and getting scars
Only makes you who you are
Only makes you who you are.
No matter how much your heart is aching
There is beauty in the breaking
Yeah
(Repeat chorus)
Better days are you gonna find you once again
Everything will find its place
When you're broken,
when you're broken
(Repeat chorus)
Oh when you're broken
When you're broken
When you're broken
Psalm 34:18 (New International Version)
18 The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
What does it meant to be broken? Is it beyond repair? Can it no longer be of use?
As we sat in a back pew at church a few weeks ago I heard Bradley saying, "Mommy, look it's broken."
"What's broken?"
"My crayon," and Bradley held up the crayon.
The tip of it had been broken off.
So many times we look at things and declare them broken, but it's not this label that distinguishes it from everything else. It is what we decide to do about it. It's our actions that determine what it truly means to be broken. I chose to show Bradley the crayon could still be used, we just needed to peel back the paper.
Can you think of other instances in your life when you've declared something broken or felt broken? Have you ever cried out to God asking, "Why?" Have you ever had those days when you think it may be an okay day, but then you get one piece of bad news, followed by another, and it feels as if you can't go any further? What do you decide to do?
Whether the broken item is something concrete, tangible or whether it is a feeling; it is up to you to decide. As the scripture verse at the beginning of this post says, God is with the brokenhearted. Even if you feel as if you are broken, God still loves you, he still cares.
As I've written in the past, sometimes you have to fall in order to become stronger. The same is true for being broken. So you make the choice, do you give up on life just because a few things go wrong and you feel as if you will never have the strength to go on? Or do you give in, hit rock bottom, then fight to survive and pick up the pieces so you become stronger? Can you pick up all those pieces without God?
Lord, please help us all to find you through our struggles. Help us to find the belief in our self and to find the strength that you know we possess. Amen.
Broken by Lindsey Haun
Wake up to a sunny day,
Not a cloud up in the sky
Then it starts to rain.
My defenses hit the ground,
and they shatter all around
So open and exposed
But I find strength in the struggle
Face to face with my trouble
Chorus: When you're broken,
in a million little pieces
And you're trying,
but you can't hold on anymore
Every tear falls down for a reason
Don't you stop believing in yourself
When you're broken.
Little girl don't be so blue
I know what you're going through
Don't let it beat you up.
Hitting walls and getting scars
Only makes you who you are
Only makes you who you are.
No matter how much your heart is aching
There is beauty in the breaking
Yeah
(Repeat chorus)
Better days are you gonna find you once again
Everything will find its place
When you're broken,
when you're broken
(Repeat chorus)
Oh when you're broken
When you're broken
When you're broken
Monday, April 27, 2009
The Stripper
The closer we got to Charleston, the more my toes began to wiggle. "Ahhhh....the beach is so close, but will we have time?" was all I could think about other than Bradley and finding the answers. It didn't matter because I would make the time. Even if it meant getting back a little late. You simply cannot get this close to a beach and not dig your toes in the sand.
As we left the dermatologists office, we started the lunch discussion. Mark and his desire for Melvins and my philosophy that just like having to go to the beach, you've gotta enjoy some good seafood. I decided that maybe we should get seafood for lunch because of lunch menu prices (big laugh there) and do Melvin's for dinner.
Since we had 3 hours to kill we decided to double check to see if Sullivan's was open....it wasn't, so we went over to Isle of Palms and ate at Coconut Joes. While dining on the porch looking out over the ocean I could feel all the stress from the past months just melt away. God knew what he was doing by guiding us to eat with such a view.
To make things even better, we still had enough time to walk down to the beach. While mom changed into sandals and Mark double checked our parking time, I headed with Bradley down to the beach. As my toes sank into the warm sand whatever was left of stress was gone. I was energized and could barely contain my excitement as Bradley discarded his blanket (he had been keeping it because his hands hurt), kicked off his own shoes and let me roll up his pant legs.
Given the previous years of Bradley screaming once in the water, I thought I'd give it a go to get him to run after me or at least step into the water. As we chased each other being dinosaurs and monsters the uninhibited laughter of a three year old boy rang over the wind. The best part: it wasn't another 3 year old, it was Bradley. My Bradley. It had been so long since he had run, laughed, giggled, and carried on like any three year old should be able to do. It was as if all the pain he'd been feeling had disappeared. Ah...the power of the beach.
I could see Mark and my mom getting closer and Bradley and I kept up with our frolicking. Next thing I know he's complaining because his pants were wet. And then it happened....
he STRIPPED!
As I laughed at the sight, I convinced him to put his underwear back on. By this time daddy was in the picture and helped out. I went to put his pants with our other belongings and share the story with my mom (Nana). As we got to where Bradley and Mark were, I started back chasing Bradley.
Next thing I know, my scared to death don't put me anywhere near the water are you kidding me mom this is cold and knocks me down son was wading further into the ocean. Uh oh, would one of us have to go in after him?
I think we all breathed a sigh of relief when he came running back.
That day Bradley had a chance to have a normal three year old moment and for that I thank God. It was the best ten minutes in a long time. Lord, I pray you continue to keep Bradley's spirits high and provide him with many more opportunities to be a youthful, innocent, carefree child.
As we left the dermatologists office, we started the lunch discussion. Mark and his desire for Melvins and my philosophy that just like having to go to the beach, you've gotta enjoy some good seafood. I decided that maybe we should get seafood for lunch because of lunch menu prices (big laugh there) and do Melvin's for dinner.
Since we had 3 hours to kill we decided to double check to see if Sullivan's was open....it wasn't, so we went over to Isle of Palms and ate at Coconut Joes. While dining on the porch looking out over the ocean I could feel all the stress from the past months just melt away. God knew what he was doing by guiding us to eat with such a view.
To make things even better, we still had enough time to walk down to the beach. While mom changed into sandals and Mark double checked our parking time, I headed with Bradley down to the beach. As my toes sank into the warm sand whatever was left of stress was gone. I was energized and could barely contain my excitement as Bradley discarded his blanket (he had been keeping it because his hands hurt), kicked off his own shoes and let me roll up his pant legs.
Given the previous years of Bradley screaming once in the water, I thought I'd give it a go to get him to run after me or at least step into the water. As we chased each other being dinosaurs and monsters the uninhibited laughter of a three year old boy rang over the wind. The best part: it wasn't another 3 year old, it was Bradley. My Bradley. It had been so long since he had run, laughed, giggled, and carried on like any three year old should be able to do. It was as if all the pain he'd been feeling had disappeared. Ah...the power of the beach.
I could see Mark and my mom getting closer and Bradley and I kept up with our frolicking. Next thing I know he's complaining because his pants were wet. And then it happened....
he STRIPPED!
As I laughed at the sight, I convinced him to put his underwear back on. By this time daddy was in the picture and helped out. I went to put his pants with our other belongings and share the story with my mom (Nana). As we got to where Bradley and Mark were, I started back chasing Bradley.
Next thing I know, my scared to death don't put me anywhere near the water are you kidding me mom this is cold and knocks me down son was wading further into the ocean. Uh oh, would one of us have to go in after him?
I think we all breathed a sigh of relief when he came running back.
That day Bradley had a chance to have a normal three year old moment and for that I thank God. It was the best ten minutes in a long time. Lord, I pray you continue to keep Bradley's spirits high and provide him with many more opportunities to be a youthful, innocent, carefree child.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
And the results are in....
Today was THE day.....our trip to MUSC for Bradley. I know the following will be pretty cut and dry information, but it's been a long day and we're having to face saying good bye to a family member (Meadow, our cat) because of information we found out.
First we saw the dermatologist, he's replacing 2 of Bradley's allergy meds with just one. He also prescribed new topical meds... and praise the LORD there is a medicine for his butt and genitals!!!! Bradley will also begin Narrow Band UVB light therapy. He will have to go 2-3 times a week.
And now for the alergist...
She retested many of the foods that were tested back in August just to make sure of results. As she listened to us she took down a list of foods Bradley eats almost daily and did tests for those as well (apple, potato, chicken, chocolate (the chocolate was because of our suspicions that he may be allergic). He still tests positive for egg and the protein in milk (casein), but now chicken.
He was also tested for other environmental allergens as well. Thankfully he's not allergic to cedar which his play set is made out of. He is allergic to the following trees though: White Ash, Red/River Birch, and Virginia Live Oak. For grasses he showed no signs...guess that explains why when I'm miserable he's not (he had no reaction to ragweed).
He showed a slight allergic reaction to house dust and the upsetting part: cats. Mark got Meadow while we were dating, before we were even engaged so Meadow was his first baby and has been with him for 6 years. Bradley doesn't understand because he just looked at me and said, "But I like her."
One good thing...he's not allergic to penicillium mix which Mark is allergic to.
Please continue to pray as we once again adjust our diets and lifestyles and especially for the treatment Bradley will start. Also pray for Tori Brooke. I took her to the doctor Monday for her itching. We've known she has some allergies, like peanut, and some eczema tendencies, but her feet and hands have really been bothering her. She is being referred to allergist and dermatologist to get started earlier than we did with Bradley. She does have an infection, impetigo, and she probably has dyshidrotic eczema. Of course she has to be different from Bradley...so she'll probably be allergic to dogs.
For anyone that will be caring for either Bradley or Tori they will have to be trained on EpiPen procedures...signs for when to use, how to use, and what to do.
I have a cute beach story to post later because afterall you can't drive all the way to Charleston and not have seafood and walk on the beach (even if only for 5 minutes).
First we saw the dermatologist, he's replacing 2 of Bradley's allergy meds with just one. He also prescribed new topical meds... and praise the LORD there is a medicine for his butt and genitals!!!! Bradley will also begin Narrow Band UVB light therapy. He will have to go 2-3 times a week.
And now for the alergist...
She retested many of the foods that were tested back in August just to make sure of results. As she listened to us she took down a list of foods Bradley eats almost daily and did tests for those as well (apple, potato, chicken, chocolate (the chocolate was because of our suspicions that he may be allergic). He still tests positive for egg and the protein in milk (casein), but now chicken.
He was also tested for other environmental allergens as well. Thankfully he's not allergic to cedar which his play set is made out of. He is allergic to the following trees though: White Ash, Red/River Birch, and Virginia Live Oak. For grasses he showed no signs...guess that explains why when I'm miserable he's not (he had no reaction to ragweed).
He showed a slight allergic reaction to house dust and the upsetting part: cats. Mark got Meadow while we were dating, before we were even engaged so Meadow was his first baby and has been with him for 6 years. Bradley doesn't understand because he just looked at me and said, "But I like her."
One good thing...he's not allergic to penicillium mix which Mark is allergic to.
Please continue to pray as we once again adjust our diets and lifestyles and especially for the treatment Bradley will start. Also pray for Tori Brooke. I took her to the doctor Monday for her itching. We've known she has some allergies, like peanut, and some eczema tendencies, but her feet and hands have really been bothering her. She is being referred to allergist and dermatologist to get started earlier than we did with Bradley. She does have an infection, impetigo, and she probably has dyshidrotic eczema. Of course she has to be different from Bradley...so she'll probably be allergic to dogs.
For anyone that will be caring for either Bradley or Tori they will have to be trained on EpiPen procedures...signs for when to use, how to use, and what to do.
I have a cute beach story to post later because afterall you can't drive all the way to Charleston and not have seafood and walk on the beach (even if only for 5 minutes).
Monday, April 20, 2009
Bouncing off the Walls
There are so many cute stories I want to share, but I've got one final paper due in a couple of hours and need to finish typing and proofing it. Before I do, I had to share our dinner conversation:
I was having Taco Bell and Bradley joined me and I don't just mean he came into the room or that he sat by me, but he was sitting on my lap taking my food and drink. Since he'd been bouncing off the walls all day, I decided I better hold the cup of Pepsi...yes, it says Pepsi, Dr. Pepper wasn't on sale anywhere I went for a price I would pay ($2 for a 2 liter, $4.50 for 12 cans...no thanks!). Of course Mr. Independent, don't do anything for me complains:
"No, mommy, move your hand."
To which I reply, "I'm holding it because you've been bouncing off the walls today and I don't want Pepsi all over the floor."
"I'm sorry. I won't spill it. See?" as he proceeds to carefully lean over and drink out of the straw.
A few minutes later I grab the cup to get a drink myself and we start over again with, "Mommy you don't need to hold it."
"I'm getting a drink right now."
"But mommy," and then the soft pitiful voice with the large puppy dog eyes, "I said I'm sorry for bouncing off the walls."
Ah, what's not to love about this absolutely cute, sweet, caring, most fabulous little boy. It's no wonder people have a hard time telling him no.
I was having Taco Bell and Bradley joined me and I don't just mean he came into the room or that he sat by me, but he was sitting on my lap taking my food and drink. Since he'd been bouncing off the walls all day, I decided I better hold the cup of Pepsi...yes, it says Pepsi, Dr. Pepper wasn't on sale anywhere I went for a price I would pay ($2 for a 2 liter, $4.50 for 12 cans...no thanks!). Of course Mr. Independent, don't do anything for me complains:
"No, mommy, move your hand."
To which I reply, "I'm holding it because you've been bouncing off the walls today and I don't want Pepsi all over the floor."
"I'm sorry. I won't spill it. See?" as he proceeds to carefully lean over and drink out of the straw.
A few minutes later I grab the cup to get a drink myself and we start over again with, "Mommy you don't need to hold it."
"I'm getting a drink right now."
"But mommy," and then the soft pitiful voice with the large puppy dog eyes, "I said I'm sorry for bouncing off the walls."
Ah, what's not to love about this absolutely cute, sweet, caring, most fabulous little boy. It's no wonder people have a hard time telling him no.
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