Sharing my Story Day 6: Growing

"Why would God let this happen to me?" I asked from my hospital bed.

Have you ever questioned why God would allow something bad to happen to you? Have you ever been so frustrated about circumstances? Not quite understand why you have to endure hardships.

God never promised things would be easy. In fact in Romans 12:12 we are told to "Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer."

Patient in affliction. He knows that we are going to have hard times in life and yet we are charged to be patient during those times. Oh how hard that can be. There are many times when life has offered its trials to me. Sometimes to the point of wanting to shout, "Hey God. Haven't I proven to you that I am yours and I will continue to turn to you in times of affliction as well as times of joy. So you can ease up on the trials now. Give me a small break." Then of course I am reminded that he is preparing me for something even greater.

While it is nice to go back to the root of our Christianity, and the planning side of me wanted to spend a certain amount of time on the happy go lucky parts, my plan is not His plan and I must follow Him. Over the next few days we are going to spend time reflecting on our trials and through that reflection see how the trials have helped us grow closer in our walk with God, stronger in our faith, and see how we can use our story to help others in their walk too.

Take some time now to reflect on some of your trials. What's your story?

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"Why would God let this happen to me? Doesn't he love me?" I asked from my hospital bed.

I'm sure I floored my mom with that question, but as a 10 year old little girl in so much pain and confusion, I didn't understand. In a whirlwind of a Christmas break 1990, not only had I been rushed to the emergency room with breathing problems that ended up with a diagnosis of asthma, I landed myself back again during the same time span only to be hospitalized.

For me, everything was so scary with the feelings never felt before, the gasping for every precious breath. For my parents I can't begin to imagine how overwhelmed they were. While I have had to rush my own sweet boy at 11 months to the hospital for his first asthma attack, I didn't have to watch what my parents did. The way my ribs would sink to the back of my chest with each breath. The rush of nurses and doctors as they began working on me. Breathing treatment after breathing treatment to get things under control. And then a few days later while I still lay in the hospital bed, still yet to even have a full night's rest, listening as I questioned why God did this to me.

I don't recall my mom's reply. As a matter of fact, the are only a few things I do remember....the way it felt to struggle to breathe, questioning God, Ms. Hardy my 5th grade teacher coming to visit, my friend Jennifer and her family visiting, having to sleep on the couch after getting home so my parents could hear my breathing from their room, my start of hating the smell and anything to do with chicken noodle soup, my new found disgust with black coffee and the smell, how to listen to my body, and worrying about the hardship we were already facing as a family and knowing that this asthma thing and hospital stay only added to that.

But I learned something important. We are going to face trials in life, but God doesn't leave us during those times. In fact, these times are ones where we must learn patience and keep praying and praising.

Let us pray:
God, Life isn't always easy. As a matter of fact sometimes it is so hard it feels almost unbearable. I thank you for these times. I ask you that you help us all to remember that we still need to seek you, pray to you, trust in you, and know that during these trials you haven't left us.In Christ's name I pray, Amen.