Leading? Again?

Leadership. You would think by now, I would simply accept that no matter where I am in life, I find myself in leadership roles. High school found me as president of Mu Alpha Theta and Assistant Manager at Little Caesars. College found me an officer of Mu Alpha Theta (and even just getting it started) and Lladro specialist in the fine china and crystal department at Rich's. A short break of just a few years and then I found myself on leadership teams at school and then my current role of an instructional facilitator. In education I have been through Foundations of School Leadership as well as doctoral level classes on educational and instructional leadership. Then, just when I am seeking God's plan for me and trying to do better at following His plan versus my plan, I once again find myself in leadership. Leadership that began as a new team and has lead to my attendance at my first church focused leadership development training.

Now to simply trust God and to let go so that His plans can play out. I do not know the plans He has for me, but He knows. As a matter of fact, of all areas of leadership in the work of the church and of sharing the love of Jesus Christ, I have been called into Evangelism. Yikes! Scary word right? I mean after all, what images do you conjure up when you hear that word?

Do you picture the great Evangelists on TV? The people walking door to door pushing into your home with tracts asking you if you know Jesus Christ, if you've been saved, and if not walking you through a step-by-step on how to become saved? People shouting at you on the street corner? People judging you?

Guess what! That's not what it is or has to be. Thank GOD because I don't know how I could ever do any of those things.

Check out Luke 4:18-19:
The Spirit of the Lord is on me,
     because he has anointed me
     to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to proclaim release to the captives
   and recover sight for the blind,
   to set at liberty those who are oppressed
   to proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord.

What do you notice? Do you see the word me? In this passage it is clearly spelled out that God has put it upon us to bring others to Christ. He empowers us through the Holy Spirit to do this work. In short, Evangelism is working to relate people to God so that they may begin an intentional relationship with Jesus Christ. And it doesn't stop there. No, we must go beyond bringing others to know Christ. In effective Evangelism, we need to lead people into a lifelong journey.

Did you notice anything in Luke 4:18-19 that said I have to go door to door? That you have to go door to door? Did you notice anything that said I have to do this alone? That you have to do this alone? NO!

So what is this Evangelism that I speak of? Why am I so excited to become a leader in yet another thing? Add something more to my plate? Because it is not "another thing" and while evangelism is consuming work, it isn't necessarily more on my plate. Instead it should be the main focus on my plate.

In Matthew 4:19 Jesus calls, "Follow me and I will make you fishers of men."

In Matthew 28:19 we are then charged to go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

It is not another thing on my plate because all along it should have been and should be THE thing on my plate.

But why me? Why not the pastor? Why not the lay leaders? Why me?

Because bringing others to Jesus Christ is the responsibility of each of us. It is not just for the select few. We can all be Evangelists and what better time than now. We have to go beyond building up memberships in church. We need to grow disciples.

But I don't have the qualifications, you say. Who says? I ask.

I'll be the first to tell you I don't know all there is to know about Christianity or even the Bible, but what I do know are the essentials.

So here I find myself in this whole new world of leadership in the area of Evangelism. A world that I am excited to enter, yet fearful at the same time. I have so many ideas, yet so few. A world that makes me silently question how an introvert like me who thrives on my alone time, my books and other readings, and my processing time could possibly do this work that God has called me to do. Yet here I am and I know that God will be right there with me the entire time. I just have to trust and let Him work through me.

This afternoon Rev. Jeffrey Salley broke it all down to 3 areas of focus for effective evangelism:
1. Tell the Good News
2. Bear Witness
3. Proclaim

Yes, three simple steps starting with sharing THE Good News. There is so much bad, so much negative in the world (and guess what inside our church walls too). Think about it, when was the last time you heard good news? Shared good news? Try sharing some good news with someone in person and pay attention to how you felt and how the other person felt hearing that good news. Now multiply this feeling and that is what you will get when you share THE good news. Remember that great song you possibly sang as a child, "Jesus Loves Me." Share that news. Let others know that Jesus loves them no matter what they are going through. Look back at Luke 4:18-19. It doesn't say go find the happy, rich people and share the good news. Notice the words: poor, blind, oppressed, captives (and this will include those who are sad, happy, rich, poor, it includes everyone). We are to share the good news with everyone!

Bear witness. Share how God has worked in your life. Share your story. For the entire month of September 2014, I blogged stories. Here is the link to those: Sharing my Story Compilation. Part of witnessing is listening to others, what is their story? How does your story relate? Make the connections, build the relationship with those you are witnessing to.

Then take it right back to the Gospel. Share Jesus words, deeds, etc.

And ultimately, be patient. Evangelism is patient work. Know that it is okay if you are only the planter of the seed. I know, that is sometimes easier said than done, but I also wonder if that is why God has called me into this particular area of church leadership. I'm okay with slow and steady.

So here I am, leading once again. While I've been in this position at church for a few months now, it all hit home this week after attending charge conference and hearing that there is going to be an overall focus on Evangelism and then attending leadership training today. So I will step out of my comfort zone because if I am to lead, then I must practice what I preach. I must share the love of Jesus with others, share my story, and share the Gospel no matter how hard it is for me to just talk to people

So what about you? What are you being called to do? I've been in prayer for many months before this because I knew I wasn't quite where God wanted me to be. And now here I am.

God loves you and He has plans for you too. I ask that you begin to be in prayer for Him to show you the way He wants you to go. Open your hearts to truly listen.

How do you do it?

I've lost count of how many times I've heard the following:

"I don't know how you do it." 

"How do you do it day in and day out?"

To which I always reply, "Through God."

And normally I leave it at that, but lately I've included a little more discussion. I admit that it is HARD. It is hard to hear your child scream at you "MOMMY YOU'RE HURTING ME! PLEASE STOP MOMMY! NO! NO! NO! PLEASE! I SAID STOP!" 

All the while having to work with more patience than you ever dreamed you had, wanting to join in the screaming yourself. Hating ever second that your child screams out in excruciating pain while you simply try to apply lotions, oils, creams, medicines that you know are needed to make your child feel better. Holding your child so tightly against you that your arms ache and fingers cramp from holding wrists still. All so your child can calm done enough, not scratch, and fall asleep. Only to wake at some point in the night that you don't even know about to scratch until blood covers the bed. Eventually falling asleep again on their own to start the next day in pain because pajamas are now stuck to their skin and require carefully getting the pajamas off without pulling any scabs or skin off which leads to more screams.

But then you get a glimpse of the light that is just around the corner as the first couple of days of this all too familiar routine starts working and your child can go through their nightly routine again without the tears, without the screams. Wondering how long the good time will last this time. Sometimes I can share that we are having such an amazing day and the kids are on the mend, then without warning, I may be sharing that I need prayer warriors to pray for one of the kids because we've taken a turn for the worse. And then hours later things may be momentarily fine again. Each day really is a never ending roller coaster. 

Last night as I held Bradley tightly so he couldn't rip open his skin, I closed my eyes. I really just wanted to lay there in the dark room with him, holding him, and cry and question why. I don't question why too often, but there are times I get overwhelmed and wonder why. But last night as I closed my eyes, an image filled my mind. Instead of seeing darkness and allowing my tears to flow, I closed my eyes and saw Jesus, reaching out his comforting hand, reminding me that He is there, He is holding me as I hold my child. He is holding Bradley too. And try as I might to get angry, I just couldn't. He wouldn't let me. He wouldn't let me run. Instead he stayed right there reminding me to have patience, to trust, and to know that there are reasons beyond my understanding for all of this. 

Does this make me happy....NO. I just want my babies to enjoy life and not have to suffer unnecessarily. But for right now, this is our life. I will continue to have faith and to do what I can to ease my children's sufferings as best as I can, to take them to appointments, to shower them with love, and to embrace the moments when my babies aren't suffering. I will shout Hallelujah when times are good and turn to God in tears when life is misery....regardless, I will keep turning to God. 

Do I get tired sometimes of hearing "I don't know how you do it." At first I felt weird. Afterall, I feel like I'm doing what any mom would do. I would also think that there are so many others out there suffering so much more. But now, I embrace the statement. And no I don't get tired of hearing "I don't know how you do it". I've decided this is one way I can share my faith, my trust in and love for God. To share that without Him, then I wouldn't be able to handle any of this. I would be a complete mess. It is God's love for me, his comforting arms, his promise, and his grace that get me through each day and keep me from being a mess. Jesus LOVES me and he won't let me run away....even when I try for just a moment. I'm thankful for that.

Hands

Hands: Some are rough, some soft. Some scarred, some flawless. Some wrinkled, some smooth.

Our hands are used for many things: holding, touching, kneading, lifting, patting, digging, writing, praying.

To me, our hands can tell so many stories.

Even the Bible mentioned hands over and over from God's hand being heavy to being the hand that lifts us up to the hands of healing and the hands laid upon others so that the Holy Spirit may enter them.

Our hands are important.

About 15 years ago, I gained several extra "grandparents." One of those was Mr. Pete. Oh how I loved Mr. Pete. I cried dearly when I heard that he had passed away. Mr. Pete was such a strong, gentle, handsome loving man. What I would give to sit through another choir practice or Christmas Cantata and hear him sing "Sweet Baby Jesus Boy" Oh to hear his story like bass voice tell this story, sing this song. This spiritual. When trying to find this song now, I find so many versions, but none compare to the more spiritual sound of this song. Mr. Pete sang it as a story. In a way that I can't really describe. I wish I had video of him singing it.

There is another song I loved to hear Mr. Pete sing. A song that reminds me of him and I can almost feel him near when I think of it. Ironically, about the same time I learned of Mr. Pete's passing, I also went to visit grave sights in Virginia of my great grandparents. It was chilling when I looked up and saw my own grandparents headstone there among the others. My first thought was, "Did they die and no one told me?" Quickly I realized there were no death dates. As I walked around the stone, I saw hands in prayer and "Precious Lord Take My Hand" This was the song that I LOVED to hear Mr. Pete sing. A song I will never be able to sing and give it the same beauty as Mr. Pete, but a song I love none the less. 

In our times of praise, trouble, weariness, pain...we should lift our hands, let the Lord take us in his hands, and give us the love he has for us. The comfort only he can give. 

Luke 4:40 Now when the sun was setting, all they that had any sick with divers diseases brought them unto Him; and He laid His hands on every one of them, and healed them.

1 Timothy 4:14 Neglect not the gift that is in thee, which was given thee by prophecy, with the laying on of the hands of presbytery.

Sharing my Story Compilation

Below you will find a link to 30 days of sharing my story. Please pray with me that we all continue to learn our story and become confident in sharing our story with others. For the month of October, I will most likely move into sharing scripture and just writing my personal thoughts about it. I would love to hear what verses help you get through each of your days.

Day 1: Why?

Day 2: Beginnings

Day 3: Seeds

Day 4: More Seeds

Day 5: Growing

Day 6: Growing

Day 7: Growth and Trials

Day 8: Growth and More Trials

Day 9: Hold On, Let Go, Trials and More Trials

Day 10: What's in Store?

Day 11: Obstacles

Day 12: Accepting Christ

Day 13: Music

Day 14: Reaching Out

Day 15: Work in Progress

Day 16: Getting You Ready

Day 17: Learning to Follow

Day 18: Fears

Day 19: Strength

Day 20: We Are Clay

Day 21: Awestruck

Day 22: Plans

Day 23: Keep Making Me

Day 24: War

Day 25: War

Day 26: Knocked Down

Day 27: Growing in Faith

Day 28: Time

Day 29: Victory

Day 30: Leaving My Comfort Zone

Sharing my Story Day 30: Leaving My Comfort Zone

Wow! What started as a challenge for myself started our quite easily, then became hard, then became easy again. And now, here I am at the end of the challenge. A whole month of posts Sharing My Story. Telling others about God's work in my life or about how they can have God in their life too.

Tonight I went to my daily devotionals for inspiration and ironically it was all about the Challenge.

Isaiah 50:7 Because the Sovereign Lord helps me, I will not be disgraced. Therefore have I set my face like fling, and I know I will not be put to shame.

Psalm 37: 5-6 Commit your way to the Lord...trust (lean on, rely on, and be confident) also in Him and He will bring it to pass. And He will make your uprightness and right standing with God go forth as the light, and your justice and right as [the shining sun ] the noonday.

The devotional says, "Leave your comfort zone and move out into new territory on behalf of God's kingdom. You grow in Christ when you do something for God beyond what you've already mastered. You sense God's presence with you in personal and intimate ways.

When you attempt something difficult for God, you discover God's resources. For instance, if you make a witness speech in church even though that makes you uncomfortable, you discover abilities previously unknown to you. It is not necessary to wait until you think you are ready to do something for God. Do it, and God will make you ready. Nobody would have heard of Saint George if he had slain a dragonfly instead of a dragon.

Dear God, disturb me when I am too pleased with what I do for you. Amen"

What a devotion for today after a few months and especially this past month of stepping so completely out of my comfort zone all for God. Did I think I was ready....yeah right. But I kept putting one foot in front of the other and kept focused on God's work and He gave me everything I needed. When I was tired and had absolutely no idea what to write, he guided my fingers across the keys and let the thoughts flow. When I focused on listening to God throughout the day so I would know what to write that night, He would send me just the right song, story, or person to spark the idea. But I would not have been able to do God's work this past month without leaning on him and holding on to my faith.

So what is it that you keep putting off? What is stopping you from taking that first step? It's time to trust God and take that leap of faith. He will give you what you need, so go ahead. Step out of your comfort zone and do His work.

Although the month is over and I probably won't post everyday, I will continue to share my story and I want you to do the same. As with so many things in life, when God's in it, then it's not over. Telling my story isn't over. It's only the beginning.

Before I go, I ask that you think about your relationship with God. What story will you share with others? Have you accepted God for yourself? If you haven't, maybe that is the step you need to take. It doesn't matter how much baggage you come with or how unworthy or unready you feel. God sent His Son to die for you and to set you free from it all. It's okay if you haven't been to church or have never picked up a Bible. It doesn't say in the Bible that you must have it memorized in order to find salvation. God will take care of the details, you just need to take the step. He's calling you now. He wants to set you free.

Let us pray,

Lord I thank you for laying it on my heart to take on this challenge of telling my story and helping others to tell theirs. It has been so rewarding and although I wasn't sure I was ready for it, I took that step. I had faith that you would lead me every step of the way. I thank you for being there just like you promised. Ultimately I thank you for your Son who died for a sinner like me. Lord, tonight I pray that we all find our voice to share our stories with others. I pray that those who do not know you find their way to you. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

Sharing my Story Day 29: Victory

Music is a large part of my life. I cannot play an instrument....although one day I would love to learn to play piano and guitar.  I sing because I can't just sit and listen to music. But I LOVE music. It gets me through the each and every day. It gets me through each and every season.

While I love listening to a wide variety of music, my new fave is Contemporary Christian. However, I still love my traditional hymns. Songs like Amazing Grace, I'll Fly Away, I Shall Not Be Moved, Lord of the Dance, No Tears in Heaven, When the Roll is Called Up Yonder, This Little Light of Mine, Jesus Loves Me, and on and on and on. I can't really say I have a favorite as I can start singing one then find myself in the middle of another one without knowing how I even got there.

The hymn I am going to focus on though is Victory in Jesus. You see I have found that victory. Jesus won the victory for me. He won it for you too. He is my Savior FOREVER! He paid such a high price all so I could be with Him again one day in Heaven. He has always loved me and he has cleansed me so that I am white as snow.

For this, and this alone, I hold to my faith. Because he paid such a price. It is really quite overwhelming to know that someone loves me and you that much. So much that he seeks you out and bought you with his own blood.

So, tonight, I do not really share a story. I simply leave you to think about the songs that affect your life. What songs speak to you? Which ones do you see yourself in? Which ones can take you back to a particular season and make it feel as if you are right back there in that moment? What songs must you sing to the top of your lungs because of how it makes you feel deep inside?

Let us pray:
Lord, I thank you for music. I thank you for your Son. I thank you for your grace. I thank you for blessings. In Your Son's name I pray. Amen

Sharing my Story Day 28: Time

For everything there is a season, a time. Some seasons may be harder to deal with than others, but we have to go through those rough seasons to get to the better ones. God has appointed all these times and seasons. He is in control!

Ecclesiastes 3
1 There is a time for everything,
       and a season for every activity under the heavens:
2            a time to be born and a time to die,
              a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3            a time to kill and a time to heal,
              a time to tear down and a time to build,
4           a time to weep and a time to laugh,
             a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5           a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
             a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
6           a time to search and a time to give up,
             a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7           a time to tear and a time to mend,
             a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8           a time to love and a time to hate,
             a time for war and a time for peace.

Look around you at the world God created. You can see His mighty hand in everything. And everything you see has its own season. Think about it, you don't go to bring in the harvest in spring, because that is not its time. In spring it is time to plant, harvesting will come later.

In the book of Ecclesiastes we learn over and over again, that to seek worldly pleasures and gains, will not bring us ultimate happiness. In fact the only way to find personal meaning and happiness is through God. Temporary pleasures are just that....temporary.

But here's what I am learning to realize, where we are in our relationship with God, in our faith impacts these seasons in our lives greatly. You see, when I simply believed and didn't exactly follow or when I chose to try to hold on to as much control as possible, then those negative times were that much harder.

You see when my faith was just there, but I didn't practice it, when I didn't rely on it, when I didn't use it, then I had a harder time with mourning, with war, with tears, giving up, and hate. But you see, now as my faith is stronger and I rely on it and put it straight to use, my seasons of what use to be the harder times, really aren't that hard. They aren't as hard because God is right here with me.

When I was younger I used to blubber at funerals (even ones where I hardly knew the person). Tears would roll freely down my face and I would go through several tissues and look like a puffy eyed mess after. Now, even at the funerals where I thought I would cry the most and hardest, I didn't. For a moment, I would think I must have grown cold and callous, how could I not cry my eyes out. But then I realized, it has to do with where I am in my walk with God. So while it hurts me and is sad to lose a loved one, I really don't dwell on the mourning side for too long. Instead I am so joyful that my loved one is now free from this earthly world and that they are now celebrating with Jesus.

So why don't you join me in this peace? You can have it too and it makes each season so much easier to live through than if you are trying to go it alone. God wants you to call on him, He wants you to admit your sins, afterall, He didn't send his Son to save just a select few. He sent his Son to die on a cross for all our sins so that we may all come to know God and one day enjoy eternal life with Him.

Let us pray,
Lord, I thank you for each season in my life. The tough ones help to make me stronger and help to make sure I keep close to you in my times of need. The joyful times help me to realize and rejoice over the many blessings you have given. Lord, I know I am far from perfect, but I try every day to become better at following you and being the person you know I can be. In Christ's name I pray. Amen